J.G. Melon is part of a series of tidbits from the chapters of my book Bars, Taverns and Dives New Yorkers Love, published by Rizzoli. You can order it from Powell’s, Amazon, Rizzoli, and Barnes & Noble. Signed prints of all the bars in the book are available here.

You walk into J.G. Melon when it’s hoppin’ and Jack, it is hoppin.’ Cacophonous pandemonium. A madhouse. And yet, I like it. It feels like the place to be, and everyone there would probably agree, because you don’t go there when it’s busy if you don’t want to be there when it’s busy, and it’s busy a lot. That’s half the fun, being where it’s at.

The front room of J.G. Melon is narrow and loud and overflowing with stimuli: music coming at you from the old jukebox, the flagrantly enticing aroma of sizzling beef, melonmaniacal art all over the walls (dozens and dozens of pieces, from the red tin ceiling on down), and people, people, people. The bar juts in deep from the left, making the joint feel that much more crowded. The hungry are everywhere, waiting, scooching in, scooching out, getting seated, eating, drinking, yakking, cackling. Scads of humans: Upper East Siders, tourists, bros, kooks, geeks, first-timers, long-timers, old-timers. Moms, dads, kids, dinks, goofballs, grumps, geeks, grouches, weenies, you, me. (If you think hell is other people, stay home, Jean-Paul.) They’re all there at Melon’s RIGHT WHEN YOU ARE, and they want The Burger, but more on that later.

Recipe: J.G. Melon’s Bloody Bull

• 2+ oz. well vodka (“We pour a pretty heavy drink,” says J.G. Melon partner and manager Shaun Young.)
• About .75 oz. of lemon juice
• 4-5 “strong” dashes of Worcestershire sauce
• About 2 oz. Campbell’s beef broth
• About 2 oz. Sacramento brand tomato juice
(Nothing is measured at J.G. Melon, it’s all free-poured, so the bartender eyeballs the proportions.) Combine all ingredients in a tall glass full of ice then “roll” it all into another tall glass and back again, to mix. Garnish with a lime wedge.

• TRUE STORY: During a dinner rush in 1975, Young got a call: “Guy’s on the phone and says, ‘The President wants to eat at Melon’s and will be there in five minutes.’ I say, ‘Look, we’re full. We got a 20- to 30-minute wait.’ He says, ‘The president will be there in five minutes.’ I say, ‘OK, then.’ We set up a table and the president—Ford it was—shows up with his wife, has dinner—very nice couple—and when they’re leaving, Mrs. Ford has to use the ladies room. President Ford is waiting, and we talk for a few minutes. They leave and the guys ask me, ‘What were you talking with the president about for 10 minutes?’ I say, ‘Burgers.’ The president wanted to talk about burgers.”

Next up:

The Hi-Life Bar & Grill, an old-time NY corner steaks & chops joint featuring (are you sitting down) a real Japanese sushi bar, and another chapter of my book Bars, Taverns and Dives New Yorkers Love, which you can order right here. Limited-edition signed prints of the bars are available here